Starch Goes Back to Work


The iron has been hot and sizzling around here the past few days as Starch gets his wardrobe properly pressed for his big first day of work today. At one point there was a lull in the steady hum and hiss of the iron, and I ran to see what had gone wrong, all prepared to rescue him from who knows what kind of ironing tragedy (those things are dangerous, that’s why I stay away), but he was just downstairs frantically rummaging through boxes (as frantic as a Baptist pastor/ civil engineer/ Most Valuable Player 1000 Yards Rushing Fullback is capable of . . . so he was strategically opening boxes according to volume, methodically procuring its contents into subdivided categories, and then sorting and analyzing the data, all with a Very Serious look on his face). In a panic by this sudden and spontaneous change of events, I shouted, WHAT IS IT!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? With beads of sweat lining his brow, he managed to look up at me, eyes full of fear . . . “I’m trying to find my eraser cover.”

Now, let me back up and tell you that we had already made several trips to the store in preparation for this big day . . . mechanical pencils, check . . . things that look like rulers but are even cooler, check . . . pleated khakis, check . . . assorted white shirts with varying of patterns of blue lines, check . . . extra cans of spray starch, check . . . Spiderman lunch box (all those groovy lines in the web), check. But the ERASER SHIELD! We forgot the ERASER SHIELD! If you have ever chosen to race your potty-training toddler into the grocery story wearing Big Girl pants, only to emerge minutes later with POOP EVERYHWERE, then you may have an idea the degree of uh-oh we were in here . . .
but you can sleep sound tonight, he found his eraser shield just in time. It was in his box of pocket protectors.

Comments

Tim said…
HILARIOUS!
What makes this so funny is that i feel at fault exposing Jim to the starching addiction. Stuff if like heroin I tell ya.
Becky said…
this is great! tell jim "happy first day of work"! would bring cupcakes over =) they are my cure all! =)
Ruth said…
Jessica!! THAT Jessica? I saw your comment on my blog and then came over and read all of yours. Hooray - you're a blogger! It was so nice to catch up on your life a bit.

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