I went to the Doctor and have gained nine pounds, which is a good thing because last time by this week I had lost fifteen. I've been taking zofran, which is causing me no shortage of guilt and anxiety even though my doctor and everything I have read says that the benefits outweigh the risk, and there is a greater risk to the baby by not treating it . . . it does help control the vomiting, though I still throw-up about once a day, but it leaves the headaches and nausea so I still feel pretty darn awful most of the time.
My mother-in law is here today and I cannot begin to express how thankful I am. In fact, she has been coming up every week for about three days at a time, to take care of the girls. It is so wonderful when she is here- the girls are happy and entertained all day, I can rest and not worry about anything, all of our meals are taken care of . . . whew! What a gift she has for taking care of people! I don't know what we'd have done without all of the help from both of our families.
The girls have been wonderful through this. If I had been planning this pregnancy, knowing I would be so sick I'd have thought we needed to wait until they are older. But they are handling it amazingly well. They hadn't really learned to play together before, but now they play together for hours. It is so sweet to see them working together, Sam giving instructions and Annie calmly (sometimes) obeying them. I LOVE the ages they are at (almost 4 and 2), and I hate feeling like I'm missing out on these precious days.
I feel guilty all of the time for all that I'm not able to do for them right now. Especially Annie, I think of all of the books I could be reading to her and things I should be teaching her . . . when she sees a picture of a sheep she says, "meow," and I cringe and feel guilty. She is such an easy-going girl, however. Lately she's been waking up and wanting to sleep with us, and I am so glad to have that time with her. We spent so much time cuddling Sami, and still have to lay down with her at night, but because Annie was such an easy baby and didn't demand a lot, I feel like we missed some of those sweet times with her.
We are moving! Apparently, very soon, though you would never know it from looking at our apartment. I've not packed a thing. There's a stack of egg boxes in the middle of our living room that we all keep tripping over. I keep believing that "tomorrow" I will feel well enough to get to it . . . the thing is, I actually like to pack things. I love to organize and I love, love, to move! But currently, with my mushy pregnancy brain, nausea, and fatigue, I have no idea how we are going to pull this off.
Melissa, a friend from college, has been very much on my heart and mind the past few months. When I wake up in the night, I think of her; when my body hurts and I feel completely exasperated with being sick, I think of her . . . Melissa is fighting a courageous battle with lymphoma, and her faith has not wavered. Follow her blog to be encouraged, and please pray for Melissa and her family.